Problems and stress are a regular part of life. But have you ever noticed that that some people seem better equipped to deal with difficult relationships and the stressors of life? For example, I used to wake up and wonder where the day’s problems and my mood were going to take me. I felt trapped by unhealthy relationships, poor interpersonal boundaries, and unpredictable emotions. Life overwhelmed me. On the other hand I had a friend who could be in the midst of all sorts of drama and tension in his work place. He would smile, giggle, and say lightheartedly, “I love my job.”
The word for what I’m talking about is RESILIENCE.
Psychology Today has a succinct definition of resilience:
Resilience is that ineffable quality that allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back stronger than ever.
Rather than letting failure overcome them and drain their resolve, they find a way to rise from the ashes.
Psychologists have identified some of the factors that make someone resilient, among them a positive attitude, optimism, the ability to regulate emotions, and the ability to see failure as a form of helpful feedback.
Even after a misfortune, blessed with such an outlook, resilient people are able to change course and soldier on.
Today I consider myself a resilient person. I think what helped me the most was seeing a counselor who reflected back my worth and helped me find my voice.
Speaking of resilience, recently I’ve been introduced (via social networking) to one very resilient woman:
The first post of her blog began one month ago. Maybe you’ve seen it.
I thought the post describing her hair falling out showed how truly reslilient she is.
Do you know a reslilient person? Tell me about him or her.
Lucille Zimmerman is a Licensed Professional Counselor with a private practice in Littleton, CO and an affiliate faculty teacher at Colorado Christian University.
She is also the author of Renewed: Finding Your Inner Happy in an Overwhelmed World. Through practical ideas and relatable anecdotes, readers can better understand their strengths and their passions—and address some of the underlying struggles or hurts that make them want to keep busy or minister to others to the detriment of themselves. Renewed can help nurture those areas of women’s lives to use them better for work, family, and service. It gives readers permission to examine where they spend their energy and time, and learn to set limits and listen to “that inner voice."